Crazyfool's Column

A big Crazyfool hello to everyone on MUD. I'm an old man now Luke and it's time I came clean. I can't keep playing MUD. A long time have I taught MUD to young players like Mike and Billygoat <cough> and they always come back and kick my ass. So for now I'm not on mud. But that doesn't mean I can't write my column! I mean not much of it was factually based and well, I can blag the rest.

Droo has been dewizzed! Yes, the alcoholic Irish lout was caught tampering with essential game code that made it virtually impossible NOT to make wiz if you were Irish and had the name "Colostomy". Foddy caught onto his scam after he was searching for the name as part of a non-sexual fetish related project.

He had this to say:

"I don't have a fetish about this or any other medical equipment. There was one instance with a prosthetic arm but I apologized to Azrael and he said it was groovy. Droo has messed around before but this time he's gone too far. Now if you will excuse me, I'm going to NHS Direct ..."

Billygoat has lost his cherry. Yes, the hairy wiz lost his hymen after announcing he would run an event. Now, let's look at this. This man admits to having used a catheter on his girlfriend for sexual gratification and likes to listen to Randy Newman records while licking dogs' nipples. This man isn't sane. You can't let him run MUD for a night. Why not me? You can trust me Karya. The doctors say I'm ok ...

Ok. Why is no one making wiz? Does anyone play? Look, I demand someone make wiz before I come back. If not I'm going to kick all your asses with my brand49 power. Yeah! Not so hard now eh? Oh ... you never claimed to be. I did ... whoops. Sorry Mike ... MIKE!!!?!?!? No!?!?!?!?

Now its rap time with MC A to the mother f**kin K, Hawumph ... :(

"My name is Hawumph, dont mess with me, I can go to the maze and get a bee I hang around the start and drink tea. I like to see my hoes with teachests, Two big jugs is what I suggest. I know you can tell I'm not black, That don't mean I won't be back. I used to play mortal but I won So come join me ... erm ... Tom"

Yeah, Thanks Hawumph. Remember kids. Being American isn't big or clever. OK?

Till next time.

Crazyfool